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Hi! My stupidly long name is Charles “Pete” Conrad Jnr*, or Pete for short. Today I celebrated my first anniversary in my forever home by peeing on my mum’s bed. I even got a pillow too! Hooray for me!
When I first came to my home I didn’t like people very much. My mum says I’m lucky the Dogs’ Home of Tasmania doesn’t give up on us pooches, and found me a home with someone willing to put up with my bad temper. Blah blah blah whatever. She’s so full of herself.
The best thing she did was have a girlfriend waiting for me. She’s 12 years older than me, but if humans don’t worry about that kind of age gap, why should I? It’s kind of embarrassing to say, but I worship and adore her. I even get anxious when mum trims her claws.
Gypsy is going blind and getting quite deaf (I blame mum, her passion for Metallica is APPALLING), but she still plays chasings and wrestles with me. My second-favourite thing to do is cuddle up with her. My favourite thing to do is drink her wee and pucker my lips in appreciation.
I’ve recently been appointed Dogs’ Homes of Tasmania Special CorresPAWndent, which gives me a great opportunity to boss people around. That’s one of my favourite things. Although my mum says I’d find typing easier if I’d just let her trim my claws. Like that’s going to happen.
*Do not ask my mum, you’ll never escape. I’m serious. Just Google him.